Drug addict/eating disordered friend?

I've known this girl for a few years and we haven't talked much in the past few years because of a very complicated sitution but she does every type of drug except meth and has been in and out of rehab two times for an eating disorder and ate white oleanders to get out one of the seven times



she just doesn't have a reason to live and i wish i could give her one but life pretty much sucks especially for her, she had it pretty rough growing up, no longer has a college fund because of rehab and has failed ninth grade a few times because of absences anyway



but im talking to her and i suppose just giving her a semi-good influence helps but i would like some imput in what advice i could give her in getting clean, obviously normal programs don't help, shes been on methadone and lithium and just uses them as a supplement to her habits

what can i say to help her? why shouldn't she stay on them honestly? when you think about it. she doesn't care if she dies and can't handle pain

Drug addict/eating disordered friend?
I wish there was a good answer for your question. I wish there was some magical thing you could say to someone you love and they would quit hurting themselves. Just continue to be her friend and let her know you are their for her if and when she chooses to get help. My sister was a cocaine and heroin addict she died last year from an overdose of cocaine before she died she was in and out of rehabs at one point (when she was sober) she wrote a poem about her addiction. It is a really good poem it is posted on her website http://www.ken.malott.com/bridget/bridge... . You can try showing her this website and this poem if you want.My sister was also bipolar and used street drugs to self medicate. ufourtantley if your friend doesn't stop she will end up dead. Good Luck. I know first hand how hard it is to watch someone you love kill themselves.
Reply:unfortunately drug addiction and recovery is really a lonesome disease, no one can really pull you up but you. Make sure she has access to people who have dealt with addiction themselves and just be there as a friend when she needs one. If you get too deeply involved with her recovery and she slips she will take you down a bit too.
Reply:You can't change people. It is her life and her choices.
Reply:I think that all you can do is be there for her. It's hard to understand a person's motivations for the way they live, and there is no textbook answer because every person is unique. You maybe could find a group like Codependent Anonymous, or al-anon that could give you a little bit of insight. Also, try your local county mental health unit. They may have a counselor that can steer you in the right direction.

What you have to remember is this-In your head, you are being a good influence, but maybe not in hers. I've been in similar situations (both sides of it) and sometimes the stability that you offer actually enables this kind of lifestyle. I did some stupid things when I was young, and I used people that thought they were being my friends by trying to be a good influence. Now that I've grown up, I can see what was going on, and see when somebody is using me for a place to stay, or a meal, or somewhere to go hide for a while. I kindly but firmly let these people know that I am here for them, but won't be taken advantage of.

I am glad that you are trying to help your friend, but it is a rocky path that you are on, so please get professional advice.
Reply:Yeah! I two did the drug thing but you know what? YOUR FRIEND WILL NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER FIND HAPPINESS AND RELEASE FOR PAIN THAT WAY!!!!!!!!!

I found that I did the drug thing and the next day and the many days and months after that I realized that my problems in life WHERE STILL THERE!? I would first suggest to you to tell your friend to be truthful about her situation and find a drug de-tox place somewhere in your own town. She is going to find that this is pure hell but, after de-tox she is going to find it makes a big difference! Second, Know she probably feels her Life doesn't have a purpose probably because of some of the problems she has in countered in her past! I believe after she goes thou de-tox it would be important to ask her if she would be willing to see a priest or a christian counselor about her painful past. I think that she needs to start forgiving all of the people that have hurt her and renounce them in Jesus name! A priest or some Church's even have christian counselors that would be able to assist you and her. You would make the calls to some of the Church's in your area to see if they offer christian counseling services. But first she has to work herself off the drugs and only then if she is honest about all the people that hurt her and wants to release her pain from her past only then would I call some of the Church's. I tell you what progress will she make by just stays in her house or other peoples houses, feeling sorry for herself and getting high!? Ask her does she want a REAL HIGH!? Then I challenge her to get HIGH ON THE HOLY SPIRIT OF JESUS CHRIST!!!!!! I challenge her to make something out of her life and be a role model to someone!First before I say anything more I would like to recommend two books to you for her for finding purpose in your life! (After of course she decides drugs aren't the best way to live and she chooses to make something out of her life.) I recommend reading: 1. The Purpose Driven Life. by Rick Warren 2002 and 2. Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen 2004. Yes! I have been though depression and drugs! She got to understand there is no easy way out even if she decides to end her life. I also believe the reason she feels so depressed and she needs drugs is because her heart is feeling that something is missing. I believe that something is the love of God and Jesus Christ! The Bible says that you were created to have a fellowship with God, and to have Him at the center of your life, NOT DRUGS!. Did your friend know God loves her and values her! "God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son Jesus, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."(John 3:16)Know apart from Jesus Christ, the Bible tells us, we are "harassed and helpless, like sheep with out a shepherd" (Matt 9:36). But God loves us, and one reason he has allowed her to have this feeling of emptiness in her heart is that He loves her and wants her to seek him and have a relationship with him. No matter how hard we try or what means we use--material possessions, money, pleasure, drugs, or whatever--the emptiness is still there. The thing is that if you let your emptiness go this leads into depression AND MORE DRUG USE! How do I know this? Because I have dealt with that empty feeling, life with no purpose or meaning and eventually depression and drugs. The three things that really turned my life around was: 1. Knowing that God and Jesus Loved me and I was valued! 2. Knowing I had people on my side at church, in my social life and in my family that cared about me! and 3. I had to get myself out of the atmosphere that I was in! When you put yourself in line with what God has for you, then you will see yourself back with a renewed joy! That also means changing the atmosphere were she buys her drugs and where she uses her drugs! I would not be telling her this if I had not experienced what she feels for myself! Know down inside her, she is really looking for love and happiness but she will never find it the way she is living right now. God created her, and God loves her. His only Son, Jesus Christ, loved her so much that he gave His life on the cross so she could be saved and break free from in perfectness, sin and this empty feeling to become a child of God. When you accept Jesus Christ into your life, something wonderful and supernatural happens. God Himself comes to dwell within you! You become part of His family, and you can know the joy of His presence every day. The Bible says: "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5). She may ask "where was God in the my bad times in my life!". I tell you He was there! The fact of the matter is that we all make bad choices in life, or others make bad choices in life! But the thing is that we don't have to live like that for the future! As a christian I know that Church is a excellent place to meet people that might of once felt the way your friend does now with no purpose and they might tell her how they now live for Jesus and how they have found that purpose like me. Not only at church service but a lot of church's have activities like support groups, single events and small groups like bible study! Not only will she be meeting new people and developing relationships with them, she will be also be developing a relationship with God and Jesus by learning what the word of God (the Bible) has to offer her in her life. The fact of the matter is she needs to put herself in a new atmosphere with de-tox,forgiveness and by building a personal relationship with God! I battled though depression and drugs! So, I felt like life was just one, big black, end less, tunnel that I felt so alone and that no one valued me and my only release from anxiety was drugs! Which is not true! I later found out that I was valued! I was valued by Jesus because he gave his life on the cross for me! and in essence I was carrying my own cross and Jesus said "let me carry that for a while and you put your faith in me and I will bring you hope for the future and a future partner!" You know what? He did! Now am happily married to the woman of my dreams! I will be praying for you and your friend! I would encourage you if you know Jesus to pray for your friend that she may come to realize that she doesn't want to live life like this! I pray that one day she might find happiness and love in a purpose filled life in Jesus! May God Bless you and your friend! In Jesus Name Amen
Reply:Maybe your friend should be checked for a bipolar disorder or tested for depression. If this is part of the problem, they can put her on meds to help. There is also a drug that can be given to her to help her so she can't get high off of certain drugs.
Reply:You are very much describing a person I know, a drug addict girl. Did constantly pretty much every single drug except heroin n meth. Cocaine + pills was daily used, weighed 85 pounds... in and out of rehab and mental institututions her whole life... She died 3 weeks ago of an overdose. She took oxycotton and cocaine (in huge amounts btw, she would pretty much snort 1 gram just in one line), and this time she died.

I believe that sometimes you just can't change people like that.
Reply:if you are still young, harm reduction should not be an option. She can recover with some intensive treatment and support from very good friends like you. You could try to help her uncover any past issue that cintribute to drug abuse.
Reply:wow. im sooo sorry to hear about your friend. i honestly dont know the answer to your question and i dont think anyone else will on this site.. all i can say is ill pray for u and her.



honestly. shes the only person who can help herself now.. just be there along the way.. kinda like a shoulder to cry on. but if u ever feel too stressed over her problems take a few minute breather and just continue. its basically all u can do.
Reply:tell her how much you care about her and how stubburn it would be to continue her habbits.